Wednesday, May 26, 2010

i took Wendy to the Hospital

it's heart wrenching. i'm an introvert but in general my life goes in the crapper when Wendy's not around. so far i'm ok but i'm anxious and worried for my love.

i've taken her to the hospital in the past. it tears me apart. i can't stand the place. years ago she had a cyst on an ovary and i sat alongside while she writhed. there were times where the depression was too much to bear, times where the pain from migraines required her to seek relief from pharmaceutical solutions you could only get while admitted to the hospital.

then there's this time. this issue. this isn't the first time that this issue has caused problems for her.

Wendy has struggled with chronic pain for most of the time that i've known her ... 20 years or so now. one of the treatments to deal with this has been to exercise. exercise will release endorphins and that'll help with her pain issues. Wendy is compulsive, strong, honest and when she commits to something she's all in.

so Wendy exercised. a lot.

i know you have a picture of what a lot is but let me tell you, you're not thinking of enough of "a lot". so the treatment for chronic pain caused a lot of exercise, that wrought havoc on the size of my love's body and that in turn triggered an old eating disorder.

so now she's in the hospital to treat an eating disorder.

i love her. i trust her. i believe in her. i support her best i know how.

i also have not got a clue how to help.

7 comments:

Al said...

I think you said it well when you said: "i love her. i trust her. i believe in her. i support her best i know how."
That is what she needs, and that is what you have to give--your love, your trust, your presence.
Many situations are deep, and the solutions appear to need complex answers. However, sometimes the best help is just being there, and making sure that there are those who have expertise around her as well.
You have done what is important, and you continue to prove that you are there for the long haul.

Be encouraged, dear brother. We are with you. Ron and I will be getting together this afternoon, and you will be on our hearts.

shallowfrozenwater said...

thank you Al. your words of encouragement bring some light to some dark places in me today.

Ron Cole said...

Ian, I can only imagine what you're going through. It's easy to be like one of Job's friends a toss you some trite answer, a piece of scripture. But I just pray Jesus into the midst of your relationship with Wendy. May the Spirit hold you both close, comfort and strengthen...and protect you. and your marriage. And in Spirit our family will hold you in prayer.

shallowfrozenwater said...

and that my friends is the body of Christ at work.

Lisa said...

home late last night... just read this this morning...

praying for you and for Wendy... may you both know deeply the peace and presence of God in the midst of this space...

shallowfrozenwater said...

thank you Lisa. things have been relatively ok and the hospital folks have been very accomodating of Wendy's needs.
glad to hear that you made it home from your trip safely.

brokensaints said...

I'm just glad she has you. Things like depression and eating disorders can bring so much shame and a desire to share it with no one but that usually makes it worse. I'm glad she has someone who can be there with her and I hope you are reaching out because you will need support also...