back at the hospital

it has been on the schedule for a couple weeks now but Wendy was admitted to the hospital tonight. it wsa supposed to happen 9 days ago but the beds in the eating disorder program here in Winnipeg go first to others in the city who are in a more precarious mental health situation. it seems that the person making the arrangements was ill one day and that meant she delayed her going in for at least one of those days.

it has been a stressful time of preparation. i get in the way too much it seems and we haven't exactly seen eye to eye on some things. i've been trying to be flexible and i'm trying to hear her as she's expressing what she needs from me but the added stress in our life together has made every burr seem like a heart attack or something. i know i'm hard to live with ... but we all are.

i'm trying to pray about it and i know that i'm worried about it all. i just want some relief for her. i want her to have her life back so that we in turn can have our life back.

this past Sunday was the end of the church year. we begin anew with advent next Sunday morning. i've often thought during these transition types of days that my prayer continues to be to ask for a new season. i remember praying very fervently for a new season last New Year's and well, the season hasn't exactly been new at all. i'll still pray for answers, i'll still pray for her.

the phone call from the hospital came this afternoon but word didn't get to me until she came home from a doctor's appt. i had made it home after a long day at work and i was busy shovelling the 6 inches of snow that has been falling and blowing for nearly a week now. i've been sitting and stewing about it for a couple weeks now. it's what i do, when i get in a bad, stressful place i worry too much.

i dropped her off at the hospital. she has a nice room to herself. we spoke briefly about how she felt during the start of this ordeal. i won't be telling you about that although she did use the word "numb" to describe how she felt. pray for her. pray for me.