Moses, Jesus and an old man go golfing one day and the first hole is massive thing with water all on either side of the fairway.
Moses leads off and hits a crushing drive that hooks into the water. "it's no matter" he mutters, walks up to the water, holds up his driver, parts the water and walks out to his ball and promptly chips it onto the green. Jesus looks at this, smiles and shakes his head.
Jesus goes up next and he promptly slices it in the water on the other side of the fairway. He looks at Moses and smiles, and walks across the water, leans over and chips his ball onto the green.
the old man doesn't know what to do with all of this, this is only the first hole. he figures he should just do his best. he lines up and crushes the ball as best he can, but it's slicing toward the water too. however, as the ball is about to hit the water a fish jumps into the air and catches the ball in his mouth. before the fish can disappear beneath the water an eagle swoops down and grabs the fish right out of midair, as the eagle flies away the fish wriggles and squirms and the ball comes out of the fish's mouth. the ball falls to the ground on the green, bounces twice and goes into the hole for a hole in one.
Jesus looks at the old man and says, "cut it out Dad we're trying to play a game here."
and with that i'm watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail on DVD while i try and kick this cold.